Peace is something that doesn’t usually last for very long for me but for some reason after all the sadness, disappointment, hurt and all the other shit that was September, I have been able to find a cozy cliff of peace filled with new happenings. I won’t say that everything is peachy but things are good. My heart is so at peace while I get to enjoy the many roles I fulfill (mother, teacher, friend, wife, lover, daughter and the list goes on). As I go about my days, I roam through the corridors of my own head more than ever before, unlocking the doors that I had locked long ago and discovering new doors some of which I have they keys to, others I have yet to find a way to unlock. Things are happening all around me – carefully, cautiously, slowly but at the same time quickly.
This is where I am as 2011 rushes by trying to conclude faster than any year ever before. I want to hold onto these final two months but there are so many things happening for myself and my family that I am anxious for the calendar days to turn – one by one. I cannot wait to tell you guys about some of the opportunities that are sitting before me right now but after everything that September taught I know better than to share certain details accessible to anyone and everyone; yeah talking about “them & they”. Shh! Shh! Shh! That’s what I am telling myself until the time comes for me to reveal all the many happenings up my sleeve. I know I am not capable of containing my excitement too well. I know how much I love sharing via my writing and on social networks what is happening in my life – often in real time. That is the main reason why I am keeping my head in a stack of books.
I guess this post is about the peace that has slowed my online writing down, how that peace and slowing ushered in the new happenings and how reading has helped me maintain that peace. I have always had a love affair with books. It goes all the way back to when I was a child and got my very first library card. How holding that library card made me feel like the entire world was in my hands. The Summit Library in Palm Beach County not too far from my house was an entire world of knowledge I’d penetrate by reading books. The Summit Library the ONLY place that my parents allowed me to roam freely. As I grew older that library grew too (in size & services). It was in that building that I have so many positive memories from finding Anais Nin’s diaries and Ballet books to researching Science projects and kissing my high school boyfriend among the stacks books.
A stack of books is why I might not write here as often as you and I had grown accustomed to. I don’t know how long this slowing of my writing will be for but I know it is the right choice. There are other things that involve books, research, learning, essays and mentors that are on my horizon that won’t allow me to spend as much time writing for this site. I haven’t forgotten about you, all the wonderful women and men, that have followed my writing for the last couple of years. You are the reason why I am choosing to be on this path of roaming the corridors in my own head while I find peace in books and the happenings in my life. It is you that I hope also has peace at this time of such insecurity in America and much of the rest of the world. It is you that I hope has beautiful happenings in your life as well. It is you that I want to share a tiny nugget of truth with – when you don’t have the answers search in a book.
Keeping your head in a stack of books is very different from burying your head in the sand; ignoring your problems. Keeping your head in a stack of books is very different from having your head floating in the clouds; ignoring your problems. I am sure that you already know that reading is a wonderful escape but in today’s digital age reminders about unplugging from the matrix aren’t given often enough. Fall in love with a book or two or three or more before the year ends and I promise you that the new year will be better for it! Whether you read on an e-reader or paper books (like I still do) those moments away from others with nothing but a book and your inner voice might change you forever! I have changed.
Forever!
