What’s your biggest goal in life? What have you dreamed about since you were a little girl or a little boy? For me, it has always been one thing… becoming an author.
This year, I finally achieved my greatest goal. I wrote my first book, If You Love It, It Will Grow: A Guide To Growing Long Afro-Textured Hair, which is set to publish February 2012.
I sat down and wrote every single word of my 60,000 word manuscript. And I spent seemingly endless days locked in my home writing and revising- then writing and revising some more. But this project was not a one-woman show, not by a long shot. If not for the element of the human connection, I would not have found the inspiration for this book. Furthermore, without the help of others, I would not have been able to take a simple Word document and transform it to the beautiful book that is sitting on my bed as I type this post. From my editor, to my photographer, to my graphic designer, to my friends and my family- without the help and guidance of others, I would not have been able to make my lifelong dream a reality.
I’ve been told from a young age that I had many gifts, and I’ve used those gifts to accomplish many things. But I’ve learned that despite innate ability and talent, you cannot accomplish great things without other people. No matter how gifted you are, if you are an island unto yourself and shun the human connection, you will cut yourself off from the very source that gives you an outlet for your creativity and ideas.
The human connection comes in the form of friendships, acquaintanceships, and even enemies. Oh yes, I have found immense inspiration and strength from my enemies. And at the end of the day, I thank every individual- my closest friends, my acquaintances, and even my enemies for inspiring and facilitating human connection.
I love Maya Angelou’s poem “Alone.” Through the entire poem, Maya beautifully emphasizes the importance of connecting with people:
Lying, thinking
Last night
How to find my soul a home
Where water is not thirsty
And bread loaf is not stone
I came up with one thing
And I don’t believe I’m wrong
That nobody,
But nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Alone, all alone
Nobody, but nobody
Can make it out here alone.
Though I know I’ve been blessed with a few gifts, I recognized from a very young age that I was given one particular and highly cherished gift. Writing is my most cherished gift and I knew I wanted to be a writer after winning my first writing contest in the fifth grade. I still have the award certificate from that contest framed above the fireplace in my home.
Without a doubt, writing is my gift and it is my passion. This gift for the written word has enabled me to seamlessly translate thought and emotion to paper. It is something that has taken me into the thoughts and conversations of people around the world. It is something that has allowed me to connect with people all over the world. That is so incredible to me! People often ask me how and why I write. Simply put, I write from my soul and I write to connect to others. I write to feed my soul and to portray the human experience. My joy is connecting with people through my words. I can’t explain the euphoric feeling of putting my passion out into the universe and experiencing the deeper thought, conversation and even controversy that it generates.
Being a writer is an interesting thing, because it is a very solitary activity. And being an author can be even more isolating. For my first book I spent many days alone in my home, chained to my desk or bed, chugging away at the keys on my laptop. I literally dropped off the face of the earth and deprived myself of many simple pleasures. My friends and family can personally attest to this fact. But though my life did become isolated at times, I was never lonely or even alone. Other people were rarely far from my thoughts, and though not physically with me, everyone in my life provided a constant stream of inspiration and encouragement.
As I sit back and reflect on this year past, I know how blessed I am to have people in my life that have inspired and enabled me to achieve my lifelong goal of becoming an author. I write on many women’s issues and this is my first book of many more to come. I specifically acknowledge all the women and little girls that have read my articles on natural hair and self-esteem. I thank them especially because they were the inspiration for my first book, If You Love It, It Will Grow.
I thank God for the people placed in my life and every single day that I am given to share my passion with the world. I love this feeling of accomplishment and that I was given this gift. And if not for human connection, I surely would not be able to do what I do and be who I want to be. There is simply having a gift, and then there is using my gift to feed the soul of others. When I feed others, I am fed by default. That is what human connection is all about. I know that without the human connection, even a bread loaf will just become stone. Without the human connection, I could not make it out here alone.
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Naked Candor is an uncensored series of bold but delicate stories that reveal complicated personal truths about life, love and sex; told by those brave enough to bare!
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